Today, our youngest (of our blender family) is 12. TWELVE?!?! Is that possible? As I always do, I posted a "throwback" picture of him on his Facebook wall. I do this to all the kids. They think it is funny, but the truth is, this is how I still see them sometimes. I know he is twelve. My brain tells me he is almost a teenager. He will be in middle school this year. But sometimes, when I look at him, he is still the adorable little 13 month old I met when my husband and I were dating. He has the same big blue eyes and a smile that could melt the Grinch's heart. Cindy Lou Who don't have nothing on his smile.
And this isn't the first birthday blues...I did it for our oldest when he hit 16. (WARNING: In September, when he turns 18, there may be a video blog of just me sobbing!) I think it is the worst with the oldest and the youngest. It is like my oldest hits all the milestones first and the youngest is hitting them last.
We are lucky and blessed, for sure. I mean, our kids are good kids. He is twelve and he asked for Nerf guns. There are twelve year olds in our community out vandalizing and breaking laws and he is still just a kid doing normal kid stuff. He wants pizza for his birthday dinner out and a chocolate cake. He is a pretty great kid.
So to shake my blues, I decided to get out some pictures and look through them. I know, you are shaking your head at me and thinking, "What is she thinking?" That is when I came across the first Mother's Day card he made me in first grade. Yep....the tears started flowing. Especially when I got to the part where he said he is glad Dad chose me to his stepmom. Because just a few days ago, he told me that again.
You know what buddy, I am pretty glad too! Happy birthday to my fantastic kiddo! He will always be that mischievious little toddler who tried to blow out the unity candle as we (me, my husband and all five kids) were lighting it! And I would not change a thing about him!
Friday, July 26, 2013
Thursday, July 25, 2013
What is your favorite Superhero?
I am a huge comic book nerd. So is my husband. So are most of my kids. I was reading one of my favorites, Jupiter's Legacy (new book from Mark Millar....excellent!), and I got to thinking about who my favorite superhero has to be.
I realized I have a couple.
Don't you wish life was that way? But isn't it? Think about the monsters in life? The bad guys...they are really just broken people who do bad things. If we break it down to that, we can take the power they have for making us hurt and live in misery away. They are just people and they do not have any special powers we don't. The power they have to hurt us...we give them.
We just have to pull the mask off. And don't forget your Scooby Snack!
I realized I have a couple.
- In life, my superhero is God. There is no more powerful or benevolent being in my life. The feelings and wonders that amaze me every day are proof of His power and love.
- In my home, it is my husband. He has powers that are unbelievable. He can find the missing sock I have been looking for forever. My husband can walk in and find that can of peas I have standing there looking for and couldn't see. He can find my keys, sunglasses, shoes, purse, debit card....even after I have spent hours looking. He knows me better than I do.
- In the movies, my superhero is Thor. I have always loved the story of Thor, from a mythology standpoint. And, in Adventures in Babysitting, I loved the whole "Thor" part, in which Vincent D'Onofrio plays Thor. But I LOOOOOOOOVED the Marvel movie, Thor! LOVED it!
- In comic books, my favorite superhero is Scooby Doo. I love Scooby Doo. NOW...I understand that some may not consider Scooby Doo a superhero, but I would fight that.
Don't you wish life was that way? But isn't it? Think about the monsters in life? The bad guys...they are really just broken people who do bad things. If we break it down to that, we can take the power they have for making us hurt and live in misery away. They are just people and they do not have any special powers we don't. The power they have to hurt us...we give them.
We just have to pull the mask off. And don't forget your Scooby Snack!
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Things are going to get interesting....
I am a foodie. I make no bones about it. Prior to this silly illness that makes me as clumsy and uncoordinated as a baby giraffe, I used to cook like a crazy person. I still want to cooik, and thanks to my fantastic kids who help me in the kitchen, I still get to indulge in that passion of creating amazing food.
Alas, over the years, I have packed on some poundage. I have lost some, but let's face it, when you are dealing with a chronic illness like I am, anything you can do to make your body healthier is a bonus. So, after much research and talking with my doctors, I am taking the leap. I am a researcher. For me, specific instructions are necessary when taking on a new venture. I always hated those jobs where you apply for a specific position and then it is come in and learn trial by fire. I want training. I want information. So why would I approach this any different?
I took the advice from the doctor, as my cholesterol is high and mine may actually be caused by heredity more than diet, and upon learning my biological kids are trending like I did, I knew that we needed to eliminate unhealthy carbs and fat and sugar. I am not a huge fan of the "low carb" diets, like Atkins. But I found a "slow carb" diet. It is a diet I think I can do. I am pretty realistic in my abilities and weaknesses. Potatoes...how I love thee! But this diet feeds into my other loves: vegetables and protein. I eat two scrambled egg whites every morning already. There is only one person I would leave my beloved husband for and that is probably an avocado farmer! So I am going to give it a try. I didn't find much "negative" press on it. And there is no weird fasting or cleanses you have to do. (FYI...when someone tells me to cleanse, I get really weirded out!) It is basically what my doctor has told us to do. Cut bad carbs, which are white carbs, cut out fats that are not good for you and cut out sugar.
PLUS....and this is a big plus, one day a week is an "anything goes" day. Basically, in the description, it keeps your metabolism from stalling, plus, all those foods you crave and normally take you off the wagon...have them. Go for it. That is huge for me.
So, here we go. Dear Blog...I will keep you in the loop on how it goes. Like I said before, I love my taters! That will be the hardest part for me. My splurge day will probably be potato-heavy!
I would like, in advance, to give a huge shout-out to my hubby, Dave. You see, detoxing me off potatoes will be painful. I fully expect to be grumpy and volatile for a couple days. I love you, baby! I promise the crazy will wear off once I am used to it. Well, as much of the crazy as can wear off. You are stuck with a little crazy!
If you want to check it out, here is the link: http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/2007/04/06/how-to-lose-20-lbs-of-fat-in-30-days-without-doing-any-exercise/
Alas, over the years, I have packed on some poundage. I have lost some, but let's face it, when you are dealing with a chronic illness like I am, anything you can do to make your body healthier is a bonus. So, after much research and talking with my doctors, I am taking the leap. I am a researcher. For me, specific instructions are necessary when taking on a new venture. I always hated those jobs where you apply for a specific position and then it is come in and learn trial by fire. I want training. I want information. So why would I approach this any different?
I took the advice from the doctor, as my cholesterol is high and mine may actually be caused by heredity more than diet, and upon learning my biological kids are trending like I did, I knew that we needed to eliminate unhealthy carbs and fat and sugar. I am not a huge fan of the "low carb" diets, like Atkins. But I found a "slow carb" diet. It is a diet I think I can do. I am pretty realistic in my abilities and weaknesses. Potatoes...how I love thee! But this diet feeds into my other loves: vegetables and protein. I eat two scrambled egg whites every morning already. There is only one person I would leave my beloved husband for and that is probably an avocado farmer! So I am going to give it a try. I didn't find much "negative" press on it. And there is no weird fasting or cleanses you have to do. (FYI...when someone tells me to cleanse, I get really weirded out!) It is basically what my doctor has told us to do. Cut bad carbs, which are white carbs, cut out fats that are not good for you and cut out sugar.
PLUS....and this is a big plus, one day a week is an "anything goes" day. Basically, in the description, it keeps your metabolism from stalling, plus, all those foods you crave and normally take you off the wagon...have them. Go for it. That is huge for me.
So, here we go. Dear Blog...I will keep you in the loop on how it goes. Like I said before, I love my taters! That will be the hardest part for me. My splurge day will probably be potato-heavy!
I would like, in advance, to give a huge shout-out to my hubby, Dave. You see, detoxing me off potatoes will be painful. I fully expect to be grumpy and volatile for a couple days. I love you, baby! I promise the crazy will wear off once I am used to it. Well, as much of the crazy as can wear off. You are stuck with a little crazy!
If you want to check it out, here is the link: http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/2007/04/06/how-to-lose-20-lbs-of-fat-in-30-days-without-doing-any-exercise/
Friday, July 19, 2013
The Devils Tears
So, the other day, I was out and about with one of my kiddos and we stopped for lunch. He asked if he could try the new Bacon Habanero Quarter Pounder and I said okay. We got it to go and little later, I look back and his face is red. He was literally burning up from the hot factor. I stopped and got him a milk and it helped quiet it down. There was a TON of hot sauce on the burger. Well played, McD's worker...well played!
As he was choking, I said to him, "Are you okay?" And his reply, "I think this is made with the Devil's Tears." This caused me to nearly choke from laughing. It is amazing what our kids say to us. I sometimes think if I wrote it all down, I would have a best-seller!
But sometimes, the things they say are not quite as cute. On the flip side, another one of my kiddos had spent the previous evening with other family members. When he came in the next morning, he told me he had a funny story to tell me. He proceeded to tell me a story about a large woman, who was not very nicely dressed, who came into the restaurant they were eating at and how the adults he was with were making fun of her. He is laughing hysterically as he conveys the stories to me and as my smile fades, he realizes something is wrong. He tells me they were laughing until they were crying. I guess these are the Devil's Tears too?
I ask him, "Why is that funny?" And he sat there and said, "I guess it isn't". He then said that, for once, one of these family members, who really picks on my son, didn't pick on him and acted like he liked him for laughing along.
I sat there, looking at his sweet face, saddened by what he was telling me. This child is a very sweet child. He has a kind heart and is the kid that always wants to make someone feel better. But he betrayed who was to make another adult in his life happy.
It is a lesson we try to teach our kids, to be strong and not succumb to peer pressure. But what do you do when it isn't a peer, but a person who should be a role model and be in a position of authority? The child looks to the adult around them for behavior cues. It is confusing when those adults are mean-spirited and immature.
In the end, he understands why it was wrong and I understand why he did it. It was a lesson for us both. He is still my sweet child and I believe his heart is good and even though these influences are there, he will grow into the amazing man I know he will be.
I guess maybe there are many kinds of Devil's Tears.
As he was choking, I said to him, "Are you okay?" And his reply, "I think this is made with the Devil's Tears." This caused me to nearly choke from laughing. It is amazing what our kids say to us. I sometimes think if I wrote it all down, I would have a best-seller!
But sometimes, the things they say are not quite as cute. On the flip side, another one of my kiddos had spent the previous evening with other family members. When he came in the next morning, he told me he had a funny story to tell me. He proceeded to tell me a story about a large woman, who was not very nicely dressed, who came into the restaurant they were eating at and how the adults he was with were making fun of her. He is laughing hysterically as he conveys the stories to me and as my smile fades, he realizes something is wrong. He tells me they were laughing until they were crying. I guess these are the Devil's Tears too?
I ask him, "Why is that funny?" And he sat there and said, "I guess it isn't". He then said that, for once, one of these family members, who really picks on my son, didn't pick on him and acted like he liked him for laughing along.
I sat there, looking at his sweet face, saddened by what he was telling me. This child is a very sweet child. He has a kind heart and is the kid that always wants to make someone feel better. But he betrayed who was to make another adult in his life happy.
It is a lesson we try to teach our kids, to be strong and not succumb to peer pressure. But what do you do when it isn't a peer, but a person who should be a role model and be in a position of authority? The child looks to the adult around them for behavior cues. It is confusing when those adults are mean-spirited and immature.
In the end, he understands why it was wrong and I understand why he did it. It was a lesson for us both. He is still my sweet child and I believe his heart is good and even though these influences are there, he will grow into the amazing man I know he will be.
I guess maybe there are many kinds of Devil's Tears.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Are the colors in your world pretty?
So, my therapist says I need an outlet for my "energy" and suggested a blog. A blog...a place for me to put my thoughts out there for the world to comment on. Yeah, sounds like a plan for the person with an anxiety disorder...lol!
Well here goes. What is on my mind today? Well, remember when you were little and you got in a fight with your sibling and your parents woulds say, "There are two sides to every story and then the truth"? Well, I have been thinking about this a great deal the past few days. I mean, I have five kids in my house. I know first hand that an event can happen and I will get five different versions of the same event. Our lives color the way we see things. It is part of being human. I accept that. That is why it is important to communicate. We have drilled into our kids this very moral lesson. Your side is not the only side. I practice it in my life.
But what do you do when you are dealing with someone who lives in that "my way or the highway" life? How do you deal with with someone who refuses to accept any blame in disagreements or conflict? It is so frustrating. It is bang your head on a wall, stomp your feet and scream frustrating. You are willing to take your own blame in the conflict but you are dealing with a person who basically says, "It is all your fault".
Granted, I would love to know what it is like to be perfect. I mean, when you are saying "it is all your fault", you are, in fact, saying your are 100% blameless....a vision of perfection. Now, as a Christian, I know I am not perfect or blameless in life. We try to live our lives in the image of Christ, but we fall short, no matter how hard we try. So, when I am dealing with someone like this, all I want to say is, "Please, tell me about life as a perfect specimen of the human race!" <Yes, sarcasm is a family trait....love you, Dad!>
What I know as fact is this: disagreements happen...people in your life will hurt you, sometimes badly....we will be disappointed in our children's choices sometimes....we will be disappointed in our own choices sometimes. But I have yet to see a situation where there is discord that there was one person holding all the blame and one person who was blameless. We all contribute. The person most wrong is the one who refuses to own their part in the discord. The person most wrong is the one who blames everyone else for their faults. The person with the most blame...well that is undoubtedly the one who is going around saying "it is their fault".
I mess up....daily. The best lesson I have taught my children is probably when I tell them "I'm Sorry!". I don't always make the right decisions, but I own them. There is not a day that goes by that I don't, upon reflection, see a place where I could have been better....a better wife, a better mother, a better daughter, a better sister, a better friend...but mostly, a better Christian.
So, all of you "perfect people", I am sorry the rest of us humans disappoint you so.
Sincerely,
A very flawed and imperfect person
Well here goes. What is on my mind today? Well, remember when you were little and you got in a fight with your sibling and your parents woulds say, "There are two sides to every story and then the truth"? Well, I have been thinking about this a great deal the past few days. I mean, I have five kids in my house. I know first hand that an event can happen and I will get five different versions of the same event. Our lives color the way we see things. It is part of being human. I accept that. That is why it is important to communicate. We have drilled into our kids this very moral lesson. Your side is not the only side. I practice it in my life.
But what do you do when you are dealing with someone who lives in that "my way or the highway" life? How do you deal with with someone who refuses to accept any blame in disagreements or conflict? It is so frustrating. It is bang your head on a wall, stomp your feet and scream frustrating. You are willing to take your own blame in the conflict but you are dealing with a person who basically says, "It is all your fault".
Granted, I would love to know what it is like to be perfect. I mean, when you are saying "it is all your fault", you are, in fact, saying your are 100% blameless....a vision of perfection. Now, as a Christian, I know I am not perfect or blameless in life. We try to live our lives in the image of Christ, but we fall short, no matter how hard we try. So, when I am dealing with someone like this, all I want to say is, "Please, tell me about life as a perfect specimen of the human race!" <Yes, sarcasm is a family trait....love you, Dad!>
What I know as fact is this: disagreements happen...people in your life will hurt you, sometimes badly....we will be disappointed in our children's choices sometimes....we will be disappointed in our own choices sometimes. But I have yet to see a situation where there is discord that there was one person holding all the blame and one person who was blameless. We all contribute. The person most wrong is the one who refuses to own their part in the discord. The person most wrong is the one who blames everyone else for their faults. The person with the most blame...well that is undoubtedly the one who is going around saying "it is their fault".
I mess up....daily. The best lesson I have taught my children is probably when I tell them "I'm Sorry!". I don't always make the right decisions, but I own them. There is not a day that goes by that I don't, upon reflection, see a place where I could have been better....a better wife, a better mother, a better daughter, a better sister, a better friend...but mostly, a better Christian.
So, all of you "perfect people", I am sorry the rest of us humans disappoint you so.
Sincerely,
A very flawed and imperfect person
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